A Little Harmless Competition
by MakatiBird
Summary: ...After all, it was just a prank, harmless really. So what could possibly go wrong? Apperantly a lot, as Val and Jamie find out, some harmless competition could push Tyler a long way!
1. Shake Things Up

Chapter One

Disclaimer: Alright, you know what I have to say, I own nothing. Characters and the stuff from the show belongs to Disney, uhh, I don't know who the Three Musketeers belong to. 

Chapter One

** **

Shake Things Up

Jamie Waite lay in his bunk at the Kingsport EMS station, bored out of his mind. _"What does a guy have to do to shake things up around here?"_ he wondered, frustrated. It was summer, but an extremely uneventful one. His best friend, Catie Roth, had gone to New York for the entire summer, and despite his persistent begging to go with her, she'd merely left him, with a promise to write and call, at the airport. His only other source of amusement, his motorcycle, was at the repair shop for an indefinite amount of time with a blown engine. As a result he was stuck in Kingsport, with Hank, Val, and Tyler for company. _"I'm stranded with the Three Musketeers of Overachieving."_ He thought miserably, looking at the three other EMT's that shared the room with him. Val was sprawled upside down on the couch reading one of her fashion magazines. Her blonde hair brushed the carpet and her long legs stuck straight up in the air. "Looks like a blonde fruit bat." Jamie muttered bemusedly. Tyler was rocking back in his chair, half-heartedly scanning the paperback book in his hand, though Jamie noticed that he hadn't turned the page in ten minutes. Hank sat at the counter, busily finishing the last of yesterday's paperwork. Jamie felt his brain slowly begin to decay from lack of use. _"I need to improve the dull lives of these Super people!" _he decided finally, but he couldn't think about what he could possibly do. He didn't feel like pegging them with the expired IV bags from last weeks inventory, and he'd already taken them to an under 21 club earlier this summer- which he quickly decided he would never do again. Ever.What he wanted to do was pull a prank, a monumental one, one that had the possibility of lasting the entire rest of the summer. His dark eyes scanned the common room far a victim. Hank was way to serious, if Jamie did anything to him he'd probably mutter something about "jeopardizing the seriousness and professionalism of the squad." Or something like that. Val was, in a word, emotional. Happy or sad, Jamie didn't really want to deal with that, and he also didn't want to face the wrath of Catie for upsetting her. That left one person- Tyler. Good old Tyler. 'He's too nice for his own good anyway." He watched as Tyler glanced at Val for what seemed like the 50th time in 5minutes, and a plan formulated in his mind. Tyler would beat his head in, for sure, but this was just too good NOT to use. "Hey Val." He said suddenly. The perky blonde looked up from the article she was reading.

"Yeah Jamie?" she answered. Jamie's heart pounded against his ribcage, and he swallowed hard before speaking.

"Can I, uh, speak to you for a sec? Like, outside?" he asked nervously. _"Really smooth Waite… what are you nervous about anyway? It's just Val." __"Maybe it's the possibility of being killed by a raging football player." _Another nasty voice said in his head. Tyler and Hank were staring at him suspiciously, Val sighed

"Does it really need to be that private? I mean, normally I'd go, but if you haven't noticed, it's like 100 degrees outside, and I really don't want to leave the nice air conditioning." She put on her pleading face, the one that guaranteed she'd get anything that she wanted. Jamie nodded slowly, and she gave a relived sigh, "besides, it's only Hank and Tyler in here, and I'm SURE that they wouldn't pay attention if you didn't want them to, RIGHT GUYS?" They nodded innocently and turned back to what they were doing.

"No, I guess it's alright if they here, better sooner than later anyway." It took everything Jamie had not to smirk. He'd wanted Hank and Tyler, especially Tyler, to hear what he had to say. On cue, they looked up, interested. Slowly, he stood up and walked towards where Val now sat upright on the couch. _"Keep a straight face."_ He commanded himself silently, taking a deep breath to stifle any laughter. Before anyone knew what was going on Jamie had dropped down on one knee and taken her by the hand. Hank, Tyler, and Val thought he'd gone insane, it showed on their faces. He concentrated on staring into Val's crystal blue eyes.

"W-w-what are you doing." Val stammered, utterly bewildered. Strangely she found herself unable to disconnect herself from is gaze. A smile crossed Jamie's face

"Val, I know that what I'm doing now is, well, beyond odd, but it took me a year to get the nerve to do this…" he began, "I guess, what I mean is, that I, well, I've been completely crazy about you ever since I first saw you at EMT orientation." Val gasped, her hand flew to her mouth

"J-Jamie, I-"

"Just let me finish ok?" Val nodded, and Jamie took a deep breath, "I was just wondering if…" she looked at him expectantly, "ifyoumaybewannagooutsometime." He said quickly. She gaped at him, understanding the meaning of his brand new word, but unable to respond to it. Tyler and Hank stared disbelievingly, their mouths hanging open as Jamie gently kissed her hand. It was finally Hank that spoke.

"Ahhh, I get it man, very funny. HaHa?" he said with a hopeful laugh. It was way to weird to actually be true. Jamie's face remained completely serious. Apparently it wasn't a joke.

"Jamie," Val began cautiously, her composure regained. Instinctively she looked over at Tyler, his face frozen in utter disbelief. Her brain short-circuited. For once, she had no idea what to do. She knew she could just break his heart, but if she accepted she would then ruin any chance she had with Tyler. "Jamie, that is really one of the sweetest things that anyone's ever said to me." She smiled, "Unexpected, yes, but sweet." She allowed a laugh to escape from her glossed lips. "It's just that I had no idea about how you felt and you really caught me off guard and-" she paused as she saw his face fall, "- I'm not saying 'no'… just, I kinda need a little time to think about this." She said gently, Jamie nodded slowly, the smile coming back to his lips.

"I understand Val, I mean, I shouldn't have put so much pressure on you- I'm willing to wait for you to decide whatever you think is right." Relief washed over her, and she bent to give him a soft kiss on the cheek.

"Ok Jamie, I promise to give you an answer soon." She stood up and began to walk out of the room.

"Wait, where are you going?" Jamie called after her.

"Just to the convenience store at the corner, I've decided that I need a slushie after all this." she replied, already at the station door.

"You umm, want me to go with you or anything?" he asked.

"I'll be alright, just sit tight and I'll be back in a second." She needed alone time, and a short walk to the corner provided a good opportunity to sort out her confused thoughts. "You guys want drinks?" she yelled on her way out. A collective call of "Sure, Thanks!" came from the common room. She pushed glass doors of the station open and walked into the mid-morning sunshine.

***

As soon as he was sure that Val had left the station Tyler sprang out of his chair towards Jamie. "WHAT-DO-YOU-THINK-YOU'RE-DOING." He sputtered furiously. Jamie backed away from him defensively. 

"H-hey, you were never going to ask her out anyway, she what's your problem?!" Tyler growled at him in response, his glare focused on the glossy pink lip print that Jamie had intentionally neglected to wipe off his cheek.

"You KNEW how much I like her! But you asked her out anyway, RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME! She's not even your type! What about Catie, or Bobbi?" Jamie rolled his eyes.

"First of all, Bobbi is _ancient_ history, and Catie is my best friend! Besides, Val is, is, just perfect for me!" he sighed dreamily, a stupid grin on his face. Hank had to physically restrain Tyler before he steamrolled Jamie. After a few minutes Tyler finally spoke.

"Jamie," he said a little too calmly, "This is joke another one of your famous pranks, isn't it? You just wanted to tick me off, come on man, it's alright, I won't tell Val." It was Jamie's turn to glare

"Is it so unbelievable that someone besides YOU likes Valerie Lanier!? Huh!? If you haven't noticed Tyler, she's gorgeous! Completely and totally! Not to mention sweet and cheerful, and caring and fun to be with… just generally a desirable person! Guys are going to ask her out, ok?" The anger in Tyler's face was replaced with a pained expression.

"You don't think I know that? Every time I'm around Val I have to deal with guys drooling all over her! And now, the one place I thought I could be with her without any of that happening, here, with you guys at the station, YOU START! And what's worse, I've never seen her any closer to saying 'yes' before!" Jamie stared at his friend, who was now sitting forlornly on the couch.

"She, she was going to say yes?" he stuttered incredulously. Hank shot him a glance that said "don't push it."

"Well guys, it seems to me that we've got ourselves a healthy competition going here." A female voice said in the doorway. They looked up the see Brooke, Val's 12-year-old sister, staring down at them with a funny smile on her face. She'd heard everything that had been going on. "The only thing I can think of is for you guys to do is try and see which one of you can win over my very confused sister." She knew already who would win this contest; Val had a crush on Tyler since they were in the 9th grade. She turned around and strolled back into the file room, leaving them to think about what she'd said. Jamie glanced over at Tyler.

"I'm for it, you?" Tyler nodded thoughtfully,

"May the best man win."

***

AN: Ha! How do you like that for a chapter ending! LOL. REVIEW PLEAAAASE! I'll try to get the next chapter out soon, maybe by Friday or Saturday… Tell me what you want to happen, because if I get no response I'll assume that it sucks and stop writing. DON'T FLAME! I don't think I could handle the rejection! 

** **


	2. Improv.

"Hey, could you guys help me out

Disclaimer: I own nothing IAHB related, so don't sue. Thanks to everyone that reviewed, I guess I threw some people off on the last chapter, I hope you like this one, it should calm the fears of most of the T/V fans that feel like assassinating me right now…

Chapter 2

Improv.

**_ _**

Val finally reached the convenience store, her forehead glistening with sweat. She wasn't kidding when she told Jamie it was about 100 degrees outdoors. She pushed the glass doors open and sighed contentedly as she was met with a blast of cool air from inside. It seem like it had taken a lot longer than usual for her to get there, but she figured that was a by-product of being wrapped up in her own thoughts. _"Should I really go out with Jamie?"_ she wondered for about the hundredth time. _"He was so cute and desperate when he asked me… and it's not like he's really bad on the eyes either…"_ she giggled at that last thought. _"But I've always thought of Jamie as just a friend. As in pals, as in platonic." **"You know that's not the real reason you don't want to go." **_A wicked little voice said in the back of her head**_. "You don't want to go because you're still waiting for Tyler"_** Tyler. Everything boiled down to Tyler, no matter how hard she tried to refute it; he was the reason that she'd turned down almost every guy that had asked her out the past year. The reason why she'd missed her own homecoming. Sure, she'd always had a little bit of a crush on him, but it seemed to grow the past year, grow into something bigger. **_"What Lanier, you think you're in love with him?"_** the same voice scoffed. No. It couldn't be love. Love was mutual, and she was sure Tyler never really thought of her as more than one of his best friends, except… except that sometimes Val thought that he felt the same way about her. Sometimes he'd get this look in his eyes when they talked, but then it would fade away, almost before she realized it was there.

"Uhhh, miss, are you all right?" The clerk from behind the counter called to her. Turns out she had been standing in front of the drink freezer for about 5 minutes, staring aimlessly. She blushed crimson,

"J-just deciding on a drink." She stammered. The clerk nodded and turned back to his magazine. _"Maybe I should go out with Jamie I mean, I don't think Tyler is ever really going to like me, not in the way that I like him anyway."_ she thought sadly reaching into the freezer to pull out two sodas for Jamie and Hank. She paused before finally pulling out a Mountain Dew for Tyler, his favorite. _"Why do you care so much about getting him his favorite drink?!" _she scolded herself as she picked up her cherry slushie. "**_Because you're hopelessly in love with him."_** The annoying little voice chimed in. She nearly dropped her slushie in surprise. "I'm in love with him…" she murmured, her eyes wide. Val knew right then that she couldn't do it. She couldn't give up on Tyler. Couldn't go out with Jamie. She had to straighten this out with him, somehow, without breaking his heart. _"The problem is what am I supposed to do until I find a way to turn him down?"_

**_***_**

Val returned to the station, carefully balancing the three bottles of soda and her slushie as she struggled to open the door. Tyler and Jamie glared at each other for a split second before jumping out of their seats in a race to open the door for her. Probably due to the fact that he was an athlete, Tyler reached it first. "Here you go Val." He said sweetly. She gave him a grateful smile. 

"Hey Val, want help carrying those?" Jamie offered eagerly, having arrived too late to let her in.

"Umm, that's ok, I think I can handle it." She said, carefully avoiding having to look into him in the eye. Puzzled and a bit insulted by her obvious discomfort around him, he nodded mutely and walked back into the common room. Tyler took the sodas from her hand.

"You're going to drop these, and I really don't want for you to have to go all the way back to the store in this heat to go buy new ones." 

"Thanks, I guess that does make sense." She said, following him back into the common room. _"Awww, he's soo considerate."_ Jamie watched them stroll into the room and sit down on the couch, his eyes narrowing at sight of Tyler carrying the soda bottles that Val wouldn't let him carry. He muttered something to the effect of

"Wouldn't let ME help her but as soon as TYLER offers…" that caused Val to blush, and she quickly hid her face behind her magazine. The room slowly sank into an uncomfortable silence, as each person tried to engross themselves in their activities.

"Hey, could you guys help me out? I need a male's perspective on something." That was Val, of course. Jamie, Hank, and Tyler sat up.

"Yeah/Sure/I guess." The three answered in unison. Val motioned for them to look at something in her magazine.

"Uhh, Val, I'm not exactly a fashion guru." Jamie said sarcastically. She rolled her eyes.

"I just need an opinion, what do you think about these swimsuits? I'm going swimsuit shopping today as soon as my shift is over, and I want to see what would look good on me. Pleeeeeeeaaase?" she pouted. They sighed and glanced at the pictures, which, to their dismay, lacked models, just swimsuits.

"This is hard to do without a picture of what it would look like on a girl." Jamie grumbled. Hank and Tyler nodded in agreement.

"Well, I don't care what you do, use your imaginations. All my close girl friends have gone out of town, and I have no one to help me shop except Brooke, who isn't so helpful, so unless you guys have a sudden urge to go swimsuit shopping with me…" voice dripped with sarcasm. Jamie pretended to contemplate the thought of him spending the whole afternoon shopping for swimsuits with Val…

"Will I have to watch you trying on swimsuits the entire time?" He asked suddenly. She raised an eyebrow, 

"Do you want to?"

"Well I need to go to the mall to get a couple of CD's anyway, and our shifts end at the same time, so why not?" he answered awkwardly. She peered into his face, looking for any signs that he was messing with her. Jamie shifted uncomfortably under her scrutiny. Finally she shrugged

"Ok… if you want to we can go right after our station duty ends, I've got a change of clothes here, and since you're bike's in the shop I can give you a ride." She said agreeably.

"All right then, it's a date." He answered. She froze, looking like a deer trapped in the headlights.

"D-d-date?" she stammered. What had she done? She didn't mean to set up a date with him; she'd just wanted to go shopping. Tyler stared at the both of them, looking betrayed. He'd seen what Jamie had done too; he'd tricked her into going out with him! He glared at Jamie's head, willing it to burst into flames. 

"Val? Are you all right? You look a little pale." Jamie said worriedly, trying to ignore the death stares Tyler was shooting him. She snapped back into reality.

"Jamie, I have to speak to you in the ambulance bay- NOW" she said, pulling him towards the door by his sleeve. Jamie followed he obediently, walking to the garage and locking the door behind them. Tyler and Hank waited till they heard the lock click shut before following to listen outside the door. "Jamie, about this date thing…" Val began once she could breathe normally again. Jamie shushed her.

"I'll explain everything," he whispered, "but Tyler and Hank are listening right behind the door, so talk softly!" Val glanced towards the door and sure enough she could see Hank and Tyler's shadows showing under it. 

"Why those nosy…" she grumbled loudly. Jamie clamped his hand over her mouth.

"Shhh!" he hissed. She rolled her eyes.

"Fine, we'll do it your way secret agent boy." She lowered her voice. "Ok, Jamie listen, I-I don't think it would work out between us, you know? I like being your friend, and that's really how I want to stay." She looked into his eyes, expecting to see hurt or anger, but instead they were filled with amusement. "What's so funny?" She demanded suspiciously. He chuckled

"I wouldn't have it any other way Val. I don't want to go out, I think that we'd make much better friends than lovers." He joked. The confusion in her eyes was projected by her voice.

"What do you mean? First you get down on your knees and practically beg me to go out with you, then you set us up on a date, now you're telling me you DON'T want to go out?! How could you change your mind in the 15 seconds it took to walk from the common room to here?!"

"Ok, Val, you want the truth? I never meant it, I mean, your pretty and sweet and all, but you're my friend. I actually did this to kinda piss Tyler off and make him jealous, cause I'm sick of hearing him talk about how much he likes you without him doing anything." He hoped his last comment would deflect some of Val's anger. She narrowed her eyes. Apparently, she was still angry, "Uh oh." Jamie thought, bracing himself for the furious diatribe that he knew was coming.

"You mean this was all an act!? James Timothy Waite I'm going to…" she froze as the significance of Jamie's last sentence hit her, "He likes me?!" she squealed, forgetting to be mad. Then realizing she had made it painfully obvious that she had a crush on Tyler quickly added, "Oh, not that I really care or like him or anything, it's just really sweet to know someone…" she stopped, seeing the skepticism on his face. "Ok, ok, maybe I do like him, a little…" Jamie grinned in satisfaction.

"Ok, so what we have to do now is-"

"-Wait a minute, what makes you think I'm cooperating?" she interrupted loudly. 

"SHHHHHHHHH!" He said again. "You're cooperating because you want Tyler, right?" She rolled her eyes again, reminding Jamie of how alike she and Catie could sometimes be.

"I don't see how this is going to-"

"Just trust me, Val, ok? I've got this all figured out." He said confidently. Though her better judgment told her not to listen to him she finally agreed.

"Ok, ok, what do I have to do?" she asked resignedly. Jamie smirked triumphantly.

"How good of an actress are you?"

"Ok, what does that have to do with anything?" 

"Everything." He said impatiently.

"Ok, I'm a good actress, at least when it really matters, so what's next?" she actually wanted to hear his scheme, because the excitement in his eyes told her that this one was a doozy.

"Just follow my lead." He whispered mysteriously. Motioning towards the door he raised his voice. "Val, please, don't shut me down yet. I-I really like you! Don't waste your time on some guy that's too cowardly to love you back!" Val caught on to what he was doing immediately. 

"Improv." She chuckled; he looked her in the eye and nodded. "Jamie, what you've done today is one of the sweetest things that anyone has ever done for me… but I can't go out with you! I've loved him for so long, it's too hard to give up!" The last of her words came out as a desperate sob. Jamie winked and continued their little performance.

"Val give me a chance, please. Let me prove to you that you don't need him. One chance, I swear, I'll show you how you deserve to be treated." He pleaded. Val laughed silently at the cornball lines Jamie was using. 

"Ok Jamie," she finally managed to choke out, "One chance. Win me over. Show me how I can get over him, show me how I don't need him." She took a breath before jumping off the proverbial cliff, "Prove to me that I can stop loving Tyler Connell." Jamie's eyes popped out of his head. She'd done it; she'd really done it. She smiled nervously. _"Oh God, please don't let this completely backfire."_ She prayed.

**_***_**

Meanwhile…

Tyler and Hank positioned themselves quietly outside the door of the garage, intent on listening in on Val and Jamie's conversation. They heard Val's voice, "Jamie, about this date thing…"

"Tell him that it's not going to happen, not in a million years…" Tyler begged quietly. Hank shot him a glare,

"Shut up! I'm trying to hear what's going on in there!" he hissed, putting his ear to the door. Tyler followed suit, but heard nothing but soft, inaudible murmurs.

_"He's probably whispering sweet little nothings in her ear."_ He thought darkly, his face pulled into a jealous frown. Suddenly Jamie's voice rose dramatically

"Val, please, don't shut me down yet. I-I really like you! Don't waste your time on some guy that's too cowardly to love you back!" he begged. Tyler's eyes widened, sure, he was happy that she'd evidently turned Jamie down, but Val was in LOVE with someone? Someone that didn't like her? That hurt him worse, much worse. He turned his attention back to the doorway as Val began to speak, her voice pained

"Jamie, what you've done today is one of the sweetest things that anyone has ever done for me… "

_"What about my leprechaun snow globe?! That was sweet, ten times sweeter than asking you out!" _Tyler thought with indignation, _"Any guy could just ask you out, I-I was THERE for you!"_

"…But I've loved him for so long, it's too hard to give up!" She was crying, Tyler could hear it in her voice. 

"Who is this guy?!" he groaned, causing another sharp look from Hank. "Why would she love someone that would make her cry like this? I mean he's obviously some egotistical jerk who doesn't deserve her! I don't even deserve her, and I love her!" Hank shrugged.

"Who knows? Women always want what they can't have… It's like a challenge to their femininity or something."

"And you know this, how?" Tyler asked cautiously. Hank shrugged again. "Never mind." He sighed. Jamie's desperate voice interrupted their conversation.

"Val give me a chance, please. Let me prove to you that you don't need him. One chance, I swear, I'll show you how you deserve to be treated." Tyler could almost see Jamie begging her on his knees.

_"Please don't tell me that's she's going to fall for that! **'Show you how you deserve to be treated'** I mean COME ON!"_ Val was silent for a moment.

"Ok Jamie, one chance. Win me over. Show me how I can get over him, show me how I don't need him." Tyler's heart sank; he couldn't believe that someone as smart as Val wouldn't see through Jamie's stupid lines. Now it was over, he'd lost his chance even before he began. Val continued to speak, and though Tyler knew that what she had to say now would probably consolidate the destruction of his heart, he listened anyway. 

"Prove to me that I can stop loving Tyler Connell."He stumbled away from the door as if it had punched him. 

"She-She loves ME?!" he cried, hitting the wall. Hank grinned manically at him.

"Some 'egotistical jerk' that doesn't love her eh? That's not the most accurate description that I've heard of you lately… well, at least the part about not loving her isn't." his joke fell flat, as Tyler was still leaning on the wall for support. "Tyler, blink once if you can hear me." Tyler finally opened his mouth to speak.

"I love you too Val…" he mumbled, his eyes glazed over. Hank threw up his hands in disgust and walked back to the common room, muttering something about "seeing this coming all along" and "lovebirds." A dark thought pulled Tyler out of his happy mood. _"Jamie's got her convinced that I feel nothing for her!" _he slumped down to the floor in dismay. Val's voice rang in his head.

_"Win me over…"_ Win her over? How the heck was he supposed to do that? He was distracted by footsteps coming from the garage. Val and Jamie's footsteps. 

"If she catches me spying she'll murder me!" he panicked. A burst of adrenalin sent him flying into the common room. Hank glanced up from his paperwork to see his best friend scramble over the couch and plop down with a loud thump. Tyler tried to appear as if he'd been lying there all along as Jamie strolled into the room. "Where's Val?" he asked casually. Val, who'd just entered the room, strolled over to the couch and leaned over to look him in the eye.

"Right here." She answered, flashing him a smile that would melt diamond. Her face filled with concern. "Have you been running Tyler? You look a little tired." It was a few minutes before he could finally speak.

"Huh? Oh, no, I'm just, relaxing… Magazine?" He said quickly, handing her the issue that she'd been reading earlier.

"Uh, Thanks. I guess I'll just sit over here then." She moved over to the armchair opposite him and eased herself into the old upholstery. Tyler gave himself a mental smack.

_"Idiot! Why didn't you offer her a seat next to you?"_

_"You dork! Why didn't you ask to sit next to him?"_ Val chided herself at the same time. There was an awkward pause.

"So Val…" Tyler began, searching something to talk to her about. _"What do I say now?"_ he wondered, _"So Val… I heard that you loved me? So Val, I don't want you to go out with Jamie because I've helplessly fallen for you?"_ Funny, it had been so easy to do this before. Her head snapped up and she looked at him with anticipation.

"Yeah Tyler?" she answered calmly, hoping he couldn't see the nervousness that she was masking. _"What does he want to say? Did he hear what I said about loving him? Oh, I hope he did… or didn't… or, oh I don't know! GIVE ME A REACTION TYLER!"_ her mind screamed.

"Uhhh, thanks for the drinks." He said lamely. _"'THANKS FOR THE DRINKS?!' You did NOT just say that you complete and total LOSER!"_

_ _

"T-the drinks?" she stammered, _"Well that certainly wasn't the response that I was hoping for."_ She sighed, "No problem Tyler, anytime." She answered with fake cheerfulness. "Hey Hank, when do the shifts if the EMT-I's end?" she asked, changing the subject.

"Val, our shifts end the same time that yours does, you know that quitting time is designated by squad, not rank." He answered, impatiently. He wanted to finish the seemingly unending paperwork before they had to leave at 3:00, and it was already 2:45.

"Is that so?" Tyler nodded to affirm what Hank had already said. "Then why don't you guys come to the mall with us? You can follow in your cars, we can have late lunch there, and I can have more people to help me choose a swimsuit!" she chirped. Tyler sat up in interest.

"Us? Go with you and Jamie? But don't you guys want to be, well, _alone_?" She laughed.

""Why would we want that? It's just a trip to the mall, not like a _date_ or anything. Right Jamie?" she said, enunciating the words "not" and "date". 

"Huh? Oh, yeah, I guess." He said flatly. Tyler thought that Jamie looked crestfallen, but Val knew better then to fall for his acting again.

"So are you in or out? Come on Tyler, pretty please? I really need help deciding on a swimsuit." Tyler could never resist Val when she pleaded like that.

"Ok." He answered, sounding a lot more eager than he wanted to, Hank nodded slowly.

"Yeah, I guess I need to get some summer clothes too." 

"Great!" Val squealed happily, she glanced at her watch. "It's 2:56 right now, so we better sign out and get changed before we get a call!" she skipped out of the room to grab her stuff from the lockers. Tyler, Hank and Jamie watched as she left the room.

"Ok, who replaced her vitamins with Prozac again?" Jamie sighed. Hank and Tyler shrugged wearily before walking out the door behind her.

**_***_**

**_ _**

AN: Hey, What do you think so far? I promise that it will eventually turn out T/V, thought I really don't understand why you guys don't really like a J/V story! COME ON! THINK OUT OF THE BOX! Anywho… Many of you wrote in asking me to add some J/C stuff. Yes, there will probably be some of that, but it's in the FUTURE! Keep reviewing! My goal is to get at least more than 15 reviews for this story, but I'm not going to threaten you or anything. The next chapter may take a little longer; I'm kinda stuck on what to do next, so when you review always give me your suggestions! I might take you up on them. NO FLAMES PLEASE, it's my first story, so let's BE NICE. 


	3. Acting and Swimsuit shopping

Disclaimer: Blah Blah Blah… you know what I have to say, so I'm not going to say it again. If you really miss it, close your eyes and imagine it's there… Thanks to everyone who reviewed! It just brings so much meaning to my life to know that you all care…Special thanks to Val, for all her help with this chapter… Everyone ready for some TYLER JEALOUSY? READ ON!

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Chapter 3 

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Acting and Swimsuit Shopping 

            Jamie turned to Val as she puller her dark blue jeep into the mall parking lot. "Ready for another round of  'EMT Love Connection?'" he joked with a suggestive raise of his eyebrows. Val giggled.

            "And what did you have in mind?" she asked, "More acting?" he paused.

            "Uh, I guess so." He replied finally. Her eyes widened in shock. 

            "YOU MEAN YOU HAVEN'T PLANNED THIS OUT?! WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU?!" she smacked him lightly upside the head.

            "HEY! Watch my hair!" he cried, ducking to avoid a second hit. She fell back into her seat dejectedly,

            "So now what?" she sighed, massaging her temples. Jamie shrugged,

            "We play it by ear?" he offered unconstructively, "You know, you didn't have so much of a problem with this back at the station."

            "Yeah, well, at the station you made it seem like you knew what you were doing." She snapped.

            "Look, I can't give you a script, all right? But if a plan is what you want then fine…" his voice trailed off as he thought… "All you have to do is model those swimsuits and not treat me like an escapee from the nut house while I pretend to worship the ground you walk on." They grimaced simultaneously, which caused Val to crack a smile.

            "You're right," she said, "I mean, they bought it at the station, right?" she nervously pulled at her fingers. Jamie nodded, unbuckling his seat belt,

            "You ready to go? Cause I mean, sitting here is loads of fun and all, but my shirt is absorbing all the sunlight reflecting off of your hair." She shut off the ignition.

            "Was that a compliment?" she laughed, "No need to get into character yet James."

            "Whatever do you mean Valerie darling?" he said cheesily, stepping out of the car and opening her door for her with an exaggerated bow.

            "Caitie was right, you're completely mental!" she giggled. He put his arm around her waist as they walked toward the entrance, and to his surprise she didn't push him away, but instead leaned into him.

            "I know I am… that's why I'm so hopelessly devoted to you." He replied, holding the door open for her as she walked through. She rolled her eyes.

            "Hey, there's Tyler and Hank…" she noticed that Tyler was staring worriedly at his watch, "Are we late or something?" she was met with another shrug from Jamie. "You're absolutely useless." She sighed, still smiling. Val waved at her friends, who spotted them and began to walk through the crowd to meet them. "You ready James?" she whispered out of the corner of her mouth, her gaze focused on Tyler.

            "Ready as I'll ever be- and don't call me James!" he mumbled back. "Hey guys, what's up?" he called as soon as they were within hearing distance.

            "Long time no see… what kept you?" Tyler said as a greeting, apparently they were "late or something".

            "Oh, umm, minor musical trauma on the way over… he wanted to listen to his CDs, I wanted to listen to pop, we stopped to argue~ long story short, I won." She explained quickly. Jamie knew to play along.

            "Not fairly." He shot back "Every time I tried to put a CD on you pushed the radio button back to your station!" he continued indignantly. "I had to listen to the song 'Drowning' by the Backstreet Boys 3 times!" that was actually true, she gave him a playful shove. 

            "You liked it, you know you did." He made a face.

            "I'm never riding with you again," he vowed, "Not unless I can bring headphones."

            "Hey! I let you listen to Lifehouse!"

            "Yeah, only cause you liked the song 'Breathing'" 

            "-Guys, could you break up this little love fest so that we could get going?" that was Hank, who was standing back, watching them amusedly. Tyler poked him in the ribs angrily with his elbow. "Ow! I didn't mean it like tha-" he was met with another jab, and he quickly closed his mouth. Val blushed

            "Yeah, I guess we better get shopping before all the good swimsuits are gone." She began to walk in the direction of the swimsuit shop, and the guys followed her lead. Jamie stopped when he felt a light tap on his shoulder.

            "Excuse me young man." Jamie turned to face on older woman addressing him; standing next to her was an even older looking man.

            "Yes Mam? He asked pleasantly, as they didn't seem to want to yell at him or anything. "Hey, guys! Come back for a sec!" he called to his friends, who were already a couple of stores away. They turned around and walked quickly back to where he stood.

            "In trouble again Waite?" Tyler teased, eyeing the older couple standing in front of his friend. 

            "Very funny Connell." He said, shooting him a glare before turning back to the lady. "What was it you needed Mam? He said politely, Hank raised his eyebrows, "Mam?" he mouthed to Tyler over the lady's shoulder, he was met with a shrug from his friend.

            "Well," the lady began uncertainly, "my husband George and I were watching you and your girlfriend in the parking lot a couple of minutes ago, and I just wanted to track you down and tell you that it was really wonderful to see a young man treating the object of his affections with such care and respect! You really don't see a lot of gentlemen like you these days…" she trailed off, and Jamie realized that she was trying to figure out his name.

            "Jamie." He said helpfully. She grinned.

            "…Jamie. Why, you two reminded me of George and myself when we were young… of course that was years ago…" she laughed, smiling at him like a proud mother. The impact of what she was saying finally hit Jamie. She was talking about HIM AND VAL. 

            "G-girlfriend?" he stammered, she continued to smile, not noticing the looks of confusion etched on his and his friends' faces. Jamie saw Val walk out of the crowd towards them, looking extremely irritated.

            "Hey guys, what happened? I got to the store and you guys weren't there!" the lady turned to face her,

            "Oh! I'm glad that I got to see you before I went, see, I was talking to your boyfriend here, and I just wanted to tell him about how I thought that you two made the sweetest couple!" Val's face filled with surprise

            "B-boyfriend?!" she looked at Jamie, "James Waite, what did you tell her?" she said angrily, hands on her hips. He backed away defensively.

            "N-nothing Val! I swear, she just saw us in the parking lot and came up to talk to me!" realizing that the couple was still there, Val's anger faded, and she was embarrassed by her outburst.

            "Thank you so much, but Jamie and I have to be going now." She said with a patient smile. The old woman nodded, 

            "Take care of him now, he certainly is a wonderful young man." She gave Val's shoulder a gentle squeeze and wandered away with her husband.

            "Oh, I'll take care of him all right…" she muttered, spinning around to look Jamie in the eye. "Explain." She commanded. Jamie sighed.

            "Ok, I was following you to the store, and this random lady taps me on the shoulder and tells me that she and her husband were watching us in the parking lot and that I was a gentleman or something… I have no idea what we did to make her think that! Maybe she got us mixed up with another guy and girl? I said NOTHING." He insisted. She looked over at Tyler and Hank for confirmation.

            "Yeah nothing/ didn't say a thing." They said simultaneously, still looking extremely mystified. Her face relaxed and she suddenly burst out laughing, leaning on Tyler, who was closest to her, for support. They were puzzled and a bit scared by her sudden mood swing.

            "Riiiight, can we go then?" he suggested awkwardly. She was laughing too hard to respond, so she simply nodded her head.

            "What's so funny?!" Jamie demanded. Val had a tough time catching her breath.

            "She thought we were- I was- g-girlfriend!" she managed to choke out, before going into another fit of giggles. Tyler, reassured by her laughter, soon began to laugh with her, as did Hank, once he understood what was happening. 

            "I don't see anything relatively humorous about it." Jamie grumbled, standing among them in annoyance.

            "W-what the heck went on in the parking lot man?" Hank asked between chuckles, ""Did she spot you two making out or something?" Tyler stopped mid-laugh and looked at Val anxiously, waiting for her reply.

            _"No, they couldn't have been… she likes me-she wouldn't-"_ he thought, panic already beginning to cloud his mind. _"But he had his arm around her- until they saw us… maybe she and Jamie were-""_ **_STOP IT CONNELL you're jumping to dumb conclusions again- just like at Homecoming… Val would NEVER kiss Jamie… right?"_** he noticed that her face had turned fire-engine red, but whether it was from anger at Hank's question or from the embarrassment he couldn't tell.

            "No! Nothing happened in the parking lot- right Jamie?" she looked at him for support. He had an odd smirk on his face. _"Maybe I shouldn't have laughed at him…"_ she worried. "Jamie, tell them that nothing happened." She ordered.

            "Nothing happened." He said obediently, the smug grin still plastered on his features. He put his arm around her waist again. "Ready to shop Val?" he said, walking ahead of Tyler and Hank towards the store. 

            "What are you doing!" she hissed looking over her shoulder at Hank and Tyler. They'd stopped laughing and were staring open mouthed at them. Tyler had a look of extreme hatred on his face, his glare focused on the back of Jamie's head. "Jamie, this isn't funny… he's gonna kill you." Jamie's grin grew wider.

            "Oh yeah? Watch this." He bent his head down and whispered in her ear. "Start giggling, like I'm telling you the cutest thing you've ever heard." He said. Val giggled obediently, and he moved his head down to kiss her neck. 

            "Jamie! Stop!" she cried, astonished at what he was doing. She pushed his head away. 

            "How does he look now?" he asked devilishly, she glanced at Tyler. His hands were balled into little fists, and she thought she saw the little vein in his neck beginning to pulse.

            "Let's just say you don't want to walk home alone tonight- cause if you don't show up for work tomorrow the first place I'm checking is the morgue." Jamie gave a small laugh as they entered the swimsuit shop,

            "Good."

**_***_**

****

            "I'm going to kill him- and I'm making sure to do it slowly and painfully." Tyler growled. Hank thought he could see the steam coming out of Tyler's ears, and he recalled that the only other time he'd seen his best friend this angry- well actually, he'd never seen Tyler this angry. Not even when he was upset about William.

            "She did pull away from him when he kissed her… that's a good thing, right?" Tyler shot him a look that said, _"Are you kidding me?"_ and Hank figured that since he really wasn't helping the situation in any way, shape or form, he'd best stop talking. He watched as Jamie and Val entered the shop, Jamie's arm still looped around her waist. He hoped for Jamie's sake that the rebel didn't do anything foolish in front of Tyler anymore… the blonde had just about reached boiling point, and things would only get really ugly really fast. Hank decided that he'd be in another shop when the inevitable happened and Tyler strung Jamie up by his feet and dropped him off the second story of the mall headfirst. "Maybe we should, um, follow them?" he suggested, already steering his friend towards the shop that they had entered. Val was flitting to and fro amongst the rows of bikini's while Jamie sat waiting for her in boredom, half heartedly offering opinions about the different cuts and colors. She smiled nervously when she spotted them.

            "Tyler! I'm glad you're here! Finally someone that can be of some help to me." She gave Jamie a dirty look and continued shopping.

            "No problem." He replied, taking a seat next to Jamie, who stiffened slightly and avoided eye contact. Hank stood at the shop entrance. He realized that he had no reason to even be there; after all, he was the only person on the squad that wasn't in love with Val Lanier.

            "Hey Val?" he called, 

            "Yeah Hank?" she replied, not looking up from a rack of tankinis.

            "I'm going to, uh, leave cause, I, uh," she chuckled at his awkwardness.

            "Yes Hank, I'll meet you at American Eagle." She said, walking into the dressing room with her arms full of bathing suits. Tyler and Jamie silently wished that they could join him, but each of them were unwilling to leave to other alone with Val, for different reasons. Jamie was worried that she tell Tyler everything as soon as he left, and Tyler was worried that Jamie would- well, let's just say he didn't want to give the rest of the old ladies in the mall something to talk about. "You guys?" she called from the fitting room, "I'm coming out- laugh and face my wrath." Evidently they hadn't heard her, because as she peeked out of the fitting room she saw that they still remained slouching on the couch. _"Well if this doesn't wake them up…"_ she thought, a wicked grin on her face. She stepped into their range of vision, and had to fight hard not to laugh at their reactions. Tyler sat straight up and stared at her in awe

            "You- that's- I-I like that one" he stuttered. She was wearing a light blue strapless bikini that matched the color of her eyes exactly, with a darker blue sarong tied around her hips. 

            "Got it in black?" Jamie proposed, trying not to stare too hard. She scrunched up her nose. 

            "Black? Ewww, that color is so…"

            "Not you?" Tyler offered helpfully. Val nodded in agreement. "Besides," he continued, "she looks great in this one." Another blush spread across her cheeks.

            "Thanks Tyler… I like this one too."

            "I never said she didn't look good in it… I just like the color black, that's all..." Jamie said defensively as she headed back into the dressing room. "So are we done here?" he shouted hopefully through the closed door. She gave a skeptical laugh.

            "Done? Sit down James… I'm not even close." Jamie groaned audibly and threw himself back onto the couch. Earning pitying glances from the sales women sitting behind the counter.

            "What have I gotten myself into?" he moaned.

**_***_**

**AN: So there's the long awaited (yeah right) Chapter 3! Yay! Did you like it? It took forever and a day to figure this one out, though I don't really understand why… Anywho, you guys really came through, 21 reviews! Wow! I feel so… special. Thanks to Val, again, for all her help with reading and her ideas… Without her I'd still be staring at a blank word document! Thanks to everyone who reviewed, for your input, ideas, opinions and so on… I tried to email everyone that reviewed to show my gratitude, but not everyone left an email address, so leave one when you review and you'll get a letter too! I'm hoping for hmmmm, let's be optimistic and say, 41 reviews this time? Come on, I know you guys have got it in ya… Chapter four comes next… probably the last chapter, why? Because I really don't feel like dragging this out, it won't be funny anymore if I make it too long, and I'm running out of things to write anyway… but no fear! I'm working on some new stories… In fact here's a poll for my next one…**

** POLL: Which would you rather see? Val gets stalked or Val gets hooked on caffeine pills? (Yes this one's gonna be a tear jerker.) I have ideas for T/V AND (here's a first for me) J/C in both... so tell me which one to write!**


	4. Shades of Black and Blue

Disclaimer: Beware of falling rocks…oh wait, never mind. Ok, so I don't own them, but if Disney was searching for a great Christmas present- Jamie Waite stuffed under my tree with a bow on his head sounds great! Um I don't own Lane Bryant either (this will make sense as you read the chapter- I'm not making fun of ANY Lane Bryant customers, it was the only store that worked with my humor)

Chapter 4 

**__**

Shades of Black and Blue 

****

            An hour later found Jamie and Tyler still sitting in the swimsuit shop, waiting for Val as she tried on what seemed to Jamie as the exact same baby blue swimsuit, (though Val insisted that each one contained important differences). Jamie's patience was by then, practically non-existent, and even Tyler was beginning to look slightly annoyed. The only thing that kept them sitting in those hard wooden chairs was each one's unwillingness to leave Val alone with the other. Jamie let out an audible groan as the sales associate came by with another armload of blue swimsuits. "Would you like to try any of these? They're a brand new shipment." She asked, holding them over the door temptingly. She missed the looks of extreme hatred that the two guys aimed at her. "Go away." Jamie mouthed, praying that none of the swimsuits in her hand caught Val's eye.

            "Um, actually, no." Val replied. Their hopes rose, had she chosen? Were they free? "-But I would really like to see that black string bikini that was hanging up front. You know, the one with the butterfly? Could you get that for me in the same size?" Jamie looked up, surprised.

            "You don't like black." He reminded her as the saleslady returned and dropped the suit into her dressing room.

            "Usually, I don't. But for some reason I really liked this one- guess I've been hanging around you too much." She said with small laugh.

            "I'll say." Tyler muttered darkly. He shut his eyes and rocked back in his seat.

            "Oh! I think I like this one!" Val squealed from inside the fitting room. 

            "Well, come on out so I can see your dark side." Jamie called, more to annoy Tyler than anything. Val poked her head out from behind the door.

            "You really wanna see?" she asked nervously.

            "Don't keep us in suspense." Tyler answered sarcastically, still reclining in the chair. Val cautiously stepped out of the dressing room and cleared her throat to catch Tyler's attention. He lazily opened one eye- but as soon as he saw her the ground roared out from underneath his chair. 

"Holy-" he gasped, toppling out of his seat and landing on the floor with a thud. Val immediately ran to his side.

"Are you ok? Did you break anything?" she cried, checking for any signs of damage. He nodded, pulling himself to his feet.

"I-I, fine…I'm… you look…it's black?" he babbled. She smiled nervously and spun around, giving them a full glimpse of the suit.

"Yes, but do you like it?" she asked. Tyler stared at the swimsuit-clad figure standing in front of him. Sure, she looked beautiful, but something about what she wore just didn't seem right to Tyler. Maybe it was the fact that the suit had been chosen more to suit Jamie's tastes then his.

"What was wrong with the blue?" he said, matching her question with his own.

"T-there was nothing wrong with it. I- just wanted to see how this looked." She replied, looking slightly crestfallen. Tyler shrugged and murmured something about liking the blue one better, so she turned to gauge Jamie's reaction, hoping that it would be a bit more satisfactory. 

"Well, what do you think of your influence?" she teased. Jamie simply continued to stare at her, awed. "Jamie? Jamie, answer me!" her voice shook him out of his trance.

"W-what was the question?" he stammered.

"What. Do. You. Think?" she enunciated slowly, moving closer towards them and resting her hands on her hips. Val was oblivious to the effect that she was having on her friend.

 "T-that one?" he repeated, unable to think of anything else to say. _"Ok, now would be a great time to stop staring at her."_ He silently informed his eyes. Evidently they chose to ignore him, because he continued to stare. His brain tried again to regain control of his optical organs. _"Ok, ready, we're gonna turn away, on 3- 1…2…3… NOW!"_- No dice. His eyes weren't responding, and now he was pretty sure that he'd stopped breathing. _"K, think of something besides the jockette standing in front of you... looking really hot in that black swimsuit…wonder if she works out? Certainly looks like -NO! Stop it! Think of…iced tea… or what was it? Cold oatmeal? Or mom, think about m- Caitie! Think of Caitie!"_ him mind pleaded desperately, playing it's final trump card. That did it. He blinked- _"Score one for will power!" _he thought triumphantly, coming back to his senses. Val was still looking at him expectantly, waiting for an answer. "You're looking great!" he exclaimed, a wolfish grin on his face. She beamed appreciatively at him, and Tyler sunk down in his seat, fuming.

"I like the blue one better." He grumbled. "It's more you then this one is."

"Well, maybe it's about time for something different." Jamie countered.

"Yeah, but why mess with something that was perfect to begin with?" Tyler asked, an edge in his voice. Val bit her lower lip, aware that this conversation wasn't purely about swimsuit color anymore.

"Connell, chill, ok, people's tastes change. If Val wants the black one, then she can have the black one. The fact that she's always liked blue doesn't change the matter. Maybe blue lost its chance, and she likes black now because blue is just so darn boring." 

"I'll show you boring you-"

"Ok! Time for more swimsuits!" Val interrupted anxiously, grabbing a random one off the rack nearest to her and flying back into her dressing room. She let the door slam behind her as she leaned against the wall tiredly. "Jamie, what are you doing?" she murmured, quietly so that they wouldn't hear her. She knew that he was trying to make Tyler jealous, and that she should just play along, but she felt guilty for putting him through all this. She knew that she'd be mad if someone toyed with her like this. She glanced at the swimsuit that she was wearing, and then at the pale blue one that lay on the floor. A choice between polar opposites, and here she was, stuck in the middle with nothing else to do but ride it out. Should she tell Tyler and hope that he somehow understood? Or would she stick with Jamie, and risk the possibility of driving him even farther away?

***

"I'm this close Waite." Tyler growled as soon as Val had rushed out of sight, "This close to losing my temper."

            "Then I must be slipping. You were supposed to have lost it by now."

            "I swear Jamie. One more crack and I'll-"

            "You'll what Tyler? Put me through a wall? Strangle me with a string bikini? Bring it on jock boy." Jamie challenged, pushing himself up from his seat and towering in front of Tyler. Tyler immediately sprung up to face him, and the two stood nose to nose in front of the dressing room mirrors, identical glares on their faces.

            "Was that a challenge Hair gel?" Tyler spat, giving Jamie a little shove backwards. The dark-haired teen stumbled back slightly into a rack of discount swimsuits, but immediately regained his ground and returned the push. 

            "My hair's better than yours, buddy. I don't know if anyone's ever told you this, but sideburns went out with Grease." The sales clerks nervously watched the growing animosity between the two teens, and things would have quickly escalated into an all out fist fight, if Val hadn't stepped out of the changing room at that very moment, wearing a stunning suit.

            "Are you guys ready to go?" She asked, apparently not noticing the fact that the two were about to rip each other's throats out. "Here's the suit I'm buying!" Tyler's mouth hung open in shock. It wasn't the blue one. It wasn't the black one either. It was white. Neutral white. Angelic, pure, non-side-choosing white. He and Jamie exchanged surprised glances, and, caught in the irony of the entire situation, they began to laugh.

"What, is it that bad?" Val asked, alarmed. "I thought it was cute, and I mean, I could go back and try on more black and blue ones but-"

            "No, no it's fine." Tyler interrupted, biting back more laughter. "I'm sure it looks great on you."

            "Are you sure? Why would you be laughing if-"

            "Inside joke." Jamie cut in, saving them the explanation. "Shall we pay for it then?"

            "Well, I mean, I guess if you're sure it's a nice one…" she said hesitantly.

            "It's fine."

            "Great."

            "Beautiful."

            "Breathtaking, can we please go now?" Tyler begged, taking her by the hand and pulling her towards the register.

            "Tyler! Slow down!" she cried, as he almost guided her right into a rack of purple tankini's.

            "Oops, sorry about that. I just want to get you to the line before, um, it gets to long, because-"

            "You want to get the heck out of here?" Val finished, amused. "Guys, I know I've taken entirely too long with this, and believe, me I feel horrible for making you wait-"

            "Not as horrible as we felt waiting." Jamie grumbled, earning himself a steely glare from Val.

"It was your brilliant idea to play tag along Mr. Waite, I could have just as well gone shopping without you." she huffed, angrily folding her arms over her chest and pouting. Tyler hung back, watching the tow with a smug grin on his face. _"Yeah, laugh it up jock boy. Won't be laughing so hard in a second."_ Jamie thought bitterly, plotting his next move. He didn't know when it had evolved from a simple prank into a one-upmanship contest, but from the matching expressions of contempt on both guy's faces, neither of them was planning on losing this one. 

"Yeah, well, that just goes to show how much I like you then, doesn't it?" Jamie asked calmly, watching Val's frown fade, bit by bit, until she was smiling at him again. She had to admit, he was convincing as anything. If she didn't know that the whole lot of this was a bunch of hooey, why, she might have fallen for him then and there. Of course, knowing that it was all an act, she simply smiled and continued to play it cool.

"Well fellows, I believe that Hank is waiting for us over on the second floor. Shall we go?" she offered brightly, taking her packages and strolling out of the small boutique. Tyler stopped the dark haired rebel from following her.

"Hold on a second, Jamie, I think we need to talk." He demanded- in a voice that clearly suggested that it wasn't a polite request. Jamie sighed deeply, but nevertheless, followed.

"What is it Connell, still aching to put me in traction? The other's aren't here to break it up you know, it would be just you, me and mall security." Tyler rolled his eyes at Jamie's bravado.

"Can it Waite, I'm calling a truce." Jamie's eyebrows raised in interest.

"A truce?"

"Yeah, a truce. No matter how much we hate each other right now, for Val's sake, we keep the fighting to a minimum." He held out his hand in a cautious show of good will, and after a few moments of hard glaring, Jamie took it. "I just want to let you know, Jamie, that before this, I counted you as a friend- and hopefully, when this ends, I still will, no matter what happens. I trust you, and if Val does choose you, all I ask is that you take care of her." Jamie's hostility ebbed, and he felt his competitive spirit dying. He stared back down at the ground, for the first time, feeling ashamed at his prank. He didn't want this- didn't want to steal Val away from Tyler. Winning wasn't the point of the whole exercise- success came in losing. 

"Now, now Connell, what's with all this talk of defeat? May the best man win, right? Give it your best shot, and I'll do the same- and we'll see who she chooses in the end." Ok, he still had to be cocky, but that's all that it took. He saw the fire in Tyler's eyes, and knew that the jock's competitive edge and inability to lose was growing, while Jamie let his die. "Right then, I believe a lady's waiting for us?" he brushed carelessly past Tyler and walked to where Val waited for them outside of the store.

"Guy pow wow?" she asked curiously, as Tyler jogged out after him. Jamie shrugged.

"You could call it that. I was just inspiring your boy to victory." He whispered with a sly wink. Val gave him a weak smile and the three began to make their way to the second story of the mall.

"I'm exhausted." Val sighed, resting her head on Tyler's shoulder. "Who knew swimsuit shopping could be so tiring?" Tyler couldn't help but shoot Jamie a triumphant grin as he draped an arm over her shoulder and led her to a bench to sit down. Jamie lagged behind, realizing that it would be a good idea to leave the two alone, instead of playing tag-along and ruining the Kodak moment. 

"Um, you guys, I have to uh, check something out in- here." He said, quickly walking over to the nearest store entrance. Val and Tyler stared at him oddly.

"Jamie? Uh, what could you possibly need at Lane Bryant?" she asked, stifling a giggle.

"Maybe he needs to find his inner woman- no matter what the size." Tyler snickered, eyeing the racks of plus-sized women's clothing with amusement. "Hey look Jamie, there's a sale on extra-large lacy undergarments!"

"Extra large lacy undergarments?" Val giggled, "Wow, there's a WHOLE lotta woman in you Jamie." Tyler collapsed off the bench in hysterics, which caused the people around them to move away from them in fear.

"Har har, aren't we witty today." Jamie grumbled, turning a deep shade of pink "I'll catch up with you guys later." He ducked into the store and once again took a seat outside the fitting rooms. "God, I wish Caitie was here." he muttered, leaning back and closing his eyes.

***

            "Do you think we hurt his feelings?" Val asked worriedly, as she watched the rebel walk dejectedly into Lane Bryant. Tyler straightened and tried vainly to stop his chuckles.

            "Nah, Jamie knows we were just kidding. He's a rebel, he can handle it." He said, cracking up a gain. Val elbowed him hard in the side.

            "Be serious Tyler! I owe him a lot you know." He beeper went off and she ruffled through her purse in search of it. "Oh no!" she cried, looking at the message on the screen.

            "What's the matter, Alex need us to come in for reserve duty?" Tyler asked, looking a little annoyed. Two hours of swimsuit shopping, only to be rewarded with another shift? Not all was fair in love and EMS.

            "No." she sighed, standing up and grabbing her shopping bag, "I've got to go home." She walked over to the entrance of Lane Bryant. "Jamie! Jamie, I gotta go, so if you're done finding whatever you need in there, you can either come with me or catch a ride home with Hank." She called. Jamie jumped up out of his seat and met her at the entrance.

            "Um, I think I'll stick around here for a bit- and save myself from your music." He said with a little half smile. Val shrugged.

            "All right, if that's what you want, just page Hank and let him know that your still here so that he doesn't leave you behind." She leaned over to give him a hug. "Thanks for doing this." She whispered. "I know that you had to put up with a little more overachiever then usual today- and I really appreciate it."

            "No sweat- seeing Tyler's face when I kissed you was worth it enough for me." Jamie replied softly. Val laughed and walked towards the exit.

            "Time to face the music." She muttered sadly. Tyler followed her.

"Val, wait up! Are you in trouble at home or something?" he questioned.

            "I guess you can say that. When I get home, I'm a dead woman."

            "Why? I mean, you said that your parents knew you were shopping today! Why would they be mad at you?" he put a comforting arm around her shoulder as they walked out into the parking lot. "Troubles in the Lanier homestead?"

            "Oh, no, it's nothing like that." She replied with a tired smile. "It's just that Brooke is having another one of her famous sleepovers- and this time my parents allowed Nick, Mark, and Geoff to stay too because they thought they'd be there to chaperon the whole time. We, now my mom just paged me frantically because they forgot that they had my dad's big dinner party for his office, and they need ME to baby sit the little-" she sighed and didn't bother to finish her sentence. "Five girls, three guys! And they're all 12! I just know that I'm going to be killed!" she exclaimed sadly. Tyler watched her display with amusement.

            "Death by preteen eh? Well, I doubt that Kingsport's resident superwoman can be defeated by a little babysitting- especially with me to help out." She removed her face from her hands and stared at him.

            "No way, after everything I put you through this afternoon, you'd be willing to help me out again?" she gasped. "Are you sure you're human?" 

            "Hmm, I don't know, never bothered to check." He joked. Val smiled and planted a kiss on his cheek. 

            "Thank you." she said sincerely, trying not to pay attention to the shocked expression on his face. She gave him a warm smile, and touched the pink kiss print her kiss had left on his cheek. "You don't know how much your help means to me all the time." 

            "I'd do anything for you." he murmured quietly, but quickly realizing the sappiness of his comment, he clammed up and stared at his shoes, hoping that she hadn't heard. Val blushed, she had heard what he said, but how did one respond to something like that? She meant to keep silent, but her mouth moved on it's own accord, and the words that came out of it hardly surprised her. "So, I'll see you at my house." She mumbled. Her mouth had a habit of ruining every single moment possible- and she hated herself for it. 

            "Y-yeah, I'll, um, I'll be there." He answered still looking embarrassed. Silently, they parted ways and made for their own vehicles- each cursing themselves for their stupidity, and trying to think of a way to redeem themselves at Brooke's sleepover that night.  

***

            **A/N: All right, I know that I said that this would be the last one, but I wanted to end it right after shopping before I go into the slumber party, ok? So maybe one more chapter- and an epilogue, maybe, just to lead into the sequel. Did you like this chapter? A lot of the jokes came from late night convos with my sister while I typed- as you can see, our humor is a little off. **


	5. Meddling kids

Chapter 5

Meddling Kids

**__**

Val glanced up from her magazine at the clock on the living room wall, already worn out, and bored to tears. It had only been about an hour since she'd arrived from the mall (sadly, sans Tyler- although he did promise rush over right after his dinner) and she'd been alternating between yelling at the three boys to settle down, and halfheartedly paying attention to the girls as they caught up on the latest gossip from the drama filled halls of Kingsport Middle school. The topic of the moment was the much-awaited break up of Jen So-and-so and Bob Someone-or-other.

            "- And so Jenna Goldman tells Robbie that they're over in Spanish class, like in front of everyone! All of a sudden she just stands up and goes, 'Rob, honey, I hate to break it to you like this, but we're over- I sorta like someone else now.' Then she sits down and starts writing down irregular verb conjugations like nothing had happened! Can you believe it?" The small cluster of girls that had gathered around the main story teller- at this time is was actually Brooke- gasped and collectively shook their French braided heads, munching on the many bags of junk food as they began to rain down many scathing epithets on Jenna, (a few of the more pleasant ones being "Floozy" and, Val's personal favorite,  "Ho-biscuit"), and expressed their mutual pity for poor Robbie.

            "Hey Nick, go long!" Geoff suddenly cried from the other end of the entrance hallway. Val sprung out of her seat in worry- football declarations such as "go long" were never good indications when one was in a house- particularly one as small as the Lanier's. Moments later, Nick came rushing backwards into the living room, his hands outstretched in anticipation for the Geoff's upcoming pass, and his eyes on nothing but the foam football that was spiraling towards him. He cheered triumphantly as the ball slid smoothly into his arms, right before tripping over the ottoman and landing right smack in the middle of the girl's tight little gossip group. Val massaged her temples as angry shrieks filled the air- along with Cheetos, popcorn, chips, and any other snack food they decided to throw in his direction. 

            "Nooooo, stop, don't do that!" Val moaned, already collapsed on the couch in defeat. "Do you know how long it takes to get Cheeto stains off of upholstery?" The 12 year olds actively ignored her, of course, as Geoff and Mark rushed into the room and joined in the fray. Pillows, junk food and stuffed animals flew through the air, amidst shouts of laughter and Val pulled a throw pillow over her head and prayed that Tyler would arrive soon.

*          *          *

            When Tyler pulled into Val's driveway a few minutes later, two things immediately caught his attention. 1) That every single light was on inside the house- from what he could see in the windows, anyway. And 2) the front door was ajar and he could hear screams coming from the inside. Stopping only a second to lock his car door, he sprinted up the front steps into the house- and walked into what looked like a war zone. Junk food, stuffed animals and soda cans lay in a trail leading all the way to the living room, where the chaos was mostly centered. Brooke and her friends stood in the middle of it all- laughing like it was the best joke in the world. Val, meanwhile, scurried around with a giant plastic garbage bag, frantically cleaning up the mess.

            "Hey Tyler!" Brooke greeted cheerfully. "These are my friends, Nick, Geoff, Mark, Amanda, Nicole, Sarah, and Amy."

            "What happened here?" Tyler questioned, instead of returning her greeting. Val looked up from scooping handfuls of popcorn into the trash bag.

            "A good old fashioned food-fight." She answered wearily, moving her arm in a sweeping gesture to show him the wrecked living room. "Boy vs. Girls… and the only loser here seems to be me… but welcome to our humble home anyway." Brooke surveyed the damage that she and her friends had done with guilt.

            "Whoops." She murmured sheepishly, noticing that there wasn't an inch of floor or furniture that wasn't covered in junk- though Val did seem to be leaving a clean wake as she bustled about, clearing up. "Let me, um, help you with that Val." Brooke offered, running into the kitchen she returned with nine more trash bags- one for each of them.

            "Take a bag each guys." Tyler ordered, ignoring the groans of protest that came from the preteens. Val shot him a grateful smile- one that he readily returned, and the cleaning began.

*          *          *

            "Now what?" Nick asked as they stowed the last trash bag in the garage. Val inspected the clean living room with pride.

            "I don't know, what do you guys want to do?" A sly grin crossed Nick's face, and he looked over towards the remaining full bags of food.

            "Food fight?" he suggested playfully. His companions, along with Val and Tyler shot him deadly glares, clearly stating that if he so much as touched a bag of food that night, they'd hurt him… badly. "Ok, jeez, only joking you guys."

            "Let's make over Val!" Brooke offered excitedly. At the word "makeover" the rest of the girl's heads immediately began bobbing in agreement like a cluster of bobble headed dashboard figurines, nodding their assent and sealing her fate at the same time. She blanched. 

            "M-makeover?" she stammered feebly, beginning to back out of the room. "I-I don't think I need a makeover…" she looked at Tyler, begging for his help with her blue eyes.

            "But… um, we can't do makeovers, because the guys won't have anything to do?" he said- offering a surprisingly weak excuse. "Besides, I like the way she looks now." He added bashfully. Val ducked away, blushing, and the girls exchanged knowing glances.

            "We're not going to mutate her, or turn her into Marilyn Manson or something. In fact, I promise, she'll look ten times cooler. Go play the Playstation or something- we've got football and Mortal Kombat." Brooke ordered dismissively. The boys immediately perked at the thought of playing video games, distracting Tyler enough to allow them to usher Val into the girl's room. 

            "All right- what are you going to do to me?" she sighed, wincing as the girls threw open her closet door and collected her makeup from her vanity in the bathroom- sheesh it looked like she was getting the whole overhaul.

            "Well, it depends on what kind of look we're going for here." Brooke said slyly, "All we know is that before this night is over, you will no longer be the pastel cheerleader." She was examining Val's selection of long retired eyeshadows as she spoke- colors such as midnight black (that was during the 7th grade 'copy Caitie' phase- lasted about a week.) fireball red (she probably was high or something when she bought it- as of yet, it remained unused) and so on. A shudder of fear ran through Val- Brooke and her friends seemed to be most interested in those hideous, luminescent colors- she might as well break out the multicolored wig and call herself Bozo.

            "Hey Brooke, let's make her a punk!" Nicole called excitedly from the depths of Val's closet. Suddenly, a pair of black leather pants flew past the white closet doors and landed at Val's feet. Brooke stopped her critical assessment of Val's makeup to give an enthusiastic giggle.

            "Yeah- let's make her a rebel for Jamie!" she teased. Val pursed her lips and glared at her sister.

            "Shut up!" she yelled, hoping that Brooke's voice hadn't carried into the living room where the boys were busy playing video games.

            "Jamie Waite? That Jamie? Val likes _him_?" Amanda shrieked loudly. "Oh my gosh! I had no idea! I mean, he's hot and all but I had the impression that she liked-" Val clapped her hands over Amanda's mouth, preventing her from speaking further.

            "So she does like Jamie!" Amy declared- obviously taking Val's frantic attempts at silencing them the wrong way. 

            "All right! We will not be taking about Jamie for the rest of the evening! In fact, henceforth, nothing Jamie or Jamie related will be discussed during the entirety of your stay here. I do _not_ like him as anything more than a friend- because that's what he is, my good _friend_! Did you catch the emphasis on friend?!" she defended hotly. Sure- that was a rather loud scream of protest- but for goodness sakes… Tyler was just outside in the living room! 

            "Ha! I knew it! That, my friends, is the screech of a girl in denial." Was Amy's oh-so-wise observation. 

"She's totally hot for him." Nicole agreed, awed.

            "He just admitted in the station today, that he was completely crazy about her too." Brooke admitted conspiratorially. 

            "They'll make a totally cute couple though- you know, popular jock girl, rebel guy? It's like… Romeo and Juliet!" Amanda sighed dreamily.

            "But… I thought that guy Tyler liked her. You know, the one outside, hanging out with the guys?" the previously silent Sarah commented, rifling through Val's tops in search of something that wasn't pastel or a sweater set. The rest of the girls glanced instinctively towards the doorway, almost as if they saw through it into the living room, where Tyler sat, oblivious that he was the topic of discussion at that very moment.

            "Yeah… but you have to admit, Jamie's way hotter then Tyler. I mean, just take a look at the two of them in this squad picture!" Brooke responded, tossing them Val' photo book. Val buried her burning face in her hands, wondering how pathetic it was that 12 year olds were actually discussing her love life. She had to put a stop to this- if only for the sake of her sanity.

            "Brooke! Shut up! And the rest of you, give me that!" she snapped fiercely, gaping as the girls took no notice of her anger and proceeded to talk about… of all things… the hotness of Jamie Waite!

            "So how long have you had a crush on him, Val?" Nicole suddenly asked, "Was it, like, the moment you saw him? Or was it more, you became friends, and then you suddenly realized how great he was?"

            "I-we- no! I'm not answering that!" Val spluttered crossly, her cheeks flushed a deep pink.

            "They were friends first." Brooke replied, swiping a gunmetal grey shadow over Val's eyelids. "Nicole, put that blush away- looks like we're not going to be needing it." She remarked, noticing that her sister was turning a still deeper shade of red.

            "Fine! You know what? I'm not going to bother yelling at you anymore. You just keep talking. At least I know that it's not true." 

            "Put the leather pants and that black tank top on Val- I've got a phone call to make." Brooke instructed, slipping out of the room with her cell phone.

            "Brooke, wait… who are you-"

            "Pizza!" Brooke called back through the door. The remaining four girls crowded her into the closet so that she could change.

*          *          *

            Nothing was on TV tonight- but Jamie expected as much from summer night programming. He leaned back on his couch and closed his eyes, suddenly wondering what Caitie was doing up in New York at the moment. Probably not staring at reruns of The Real World, like he was. She'd called earlier that evening and excitedly told him of her plans to watch a Broadway showing of "The Lion King", explore Greenwich, and finally end the evening by hitting the local club scene. His lips tugged upward at the thought of all the fun that she was going to have over the next few weeks. Well, he may be bored, but at least one of them got to enjoy their summer.

*RING* 

What was that? He sat up from the couch with a start, listening closely for the sound again. *RING RING* the sound of the phone ringing again reverberated through the empty house.  Jamie shook him self for being such a moron. Right… he knew it was the phone. "A widdle jumpy there Waite?" he scoffed out loud, padding into the kitchen to pick up the telephone. "`Lo?" he greeted tiredly.

"Jamie?" A small voice questioned on the other end of the line.

"Brooke? `S that you? Whatcha doing calling me at 9 PM? Wait… what are you doing calling me at all?" he asked suspiciously. "Faxing over some paperwork for me to do- you know, just to brighten up my evening?"

"No, Jamie, I need a favor."

"Would this favor have anything to do with wielding a pen? Because you know what my answer is going to be…"

"No. Nothing station related. Promise." Brooke vowed. "I'd pinky promise, but, you know… kinda pointless over the phone. Anyway, back to the favor."

"Yes… let's get back to that, because I'll have you know that I, um I have many important plans for the evening…" he stated. Of course, his "plans" basically consisted of watching the remaining Real World episodes, and lounging around the house like a slob- but Brooke didn't know that, so it didn't matter.

"Oh, the producers are going to ask Lara to move out of the group house because of her drug use… and Anya and Mike are going to hook up."

"Hey! How did you-"

"Saw that episode of Real World last week. Now… onto the topic-"

"Why do you presume that I'm sitting at home watching Real World reruns? I have better things to do with my-"

"Yes, sure you do. Anyway, I need you to meet Val. She's going to walk to the video store, and then to Angelo's to pick us up a pizza, and you live close by, so I figured that you could, you know, go with her. Make sure she gets there safe and everything."

"What happened to boy wonder? Can't he make a quick run over there for her? Why do I have to go out and play bodyguard?" Jamie whined. 

"Because I presumed that you had nothing to do tonight- and I was going to be nice and find a roundabout way of inviting you to hang out." Jamie was silent, pondering his options. It was either sit here and vegetate on the couch… or spend the evening with 8 preteens and Mr. And Mrs. Perfect… normally and easy choice- couch all the way. He focused his attention back on the TV, not caring that Brooke was still holding for his answer on the line.

"Next, on Real World… 'Lara, I'm sorry, but we'll have to ask you to leave…'"

"Oh for the love of… tell her I'll meet her on the corner of Pike and Cedar." Jamie snapped, slamming down the phone and heading to his room to pull on his jacket.

*          *          *

            The night air was still chilly; and despite the fact that this was the middle of July- there was a palpable coolness in the air. Val shivered and hugged her bare arms as she stomped purposely down the sidewalk of her neighborhood- cursing Brooke and her friends and their sudden craving for pizza. Why in God's name was she walking? She or Tyler could just as easily have driven over and picked up the pizza and the list of movies and been back in less then five to ten minutes. But nooooooo. Brooke and the girls had insisted that one of them had to walk- and since Tyler had been in the middle of playing Madden 2001, that left her. She furiously shook her blonde head, muttering bitterly about video games, little sisters, useless guys, pizza, and anything else she could think of to blame her predicament on. Including her outfit. She looked down and observed the tiny black tank top and leather pants with distaste- it was highly likely that she would be picked up for street walking even before she reached Cedar Avenue! Tyler was certainly reluctant to let her out of the house looking like she did. In fact… he didn't really seem to like her makeover at all. Not that Val had liked it herself- but Tyler had particularly found a reason to dislike it…

            "Val!" she looked up from the rock she was kicking along the sidewalk with the toe of her black sandal. Had someone said her name? She looked side to side, and finally behind her- nope, same dark, empty streets. Just in case, she sped up her pace, walking a little faster towards the street lamp at Cedar and Pine…

            "Val!" Ok… there it was again. Maybe she should run. Yeah, running sounded great at the moment. She broke into a quick jog, ignoring the pain of her sandals slapping at her heels. Behind her, she could hear the *clomp* of fast-falling footsteps- obviously male.

            _"Yeah, time to run faster…"_ she thought, speeding up in a panic-fueled burst of speed. However… one does not run in heels. A lesson Val learned painfully as she stumbled on air and went sprawling to her knees. 

*          *          *

            "Val!" Jamie yelled once again, quickening his pace down Pike street. Wow- that girl could run. Which wasn't exactly to his benefit, since he was the chaser. "I should just walk away, right now…" he muttered, never the less sprinting off on her tail. "Val!" Jamie winced as he watched her trip on her own sandals and tumble to the sidewalk. "That definitely damaged something." He commented offhandedly, jogging up to where she lay on the ground.

            "Whoever you are, just leave me alone!" she screamed fiercely as she struggled to pull herself to her feet. A dark shadow loomed over her in the lamplight, and even in her terror, she bravely kicked out at her attacker.

            "Whoa, whoa, we'll have none of that!" Jamie said sternly, jumping back out of rang of her leather-clad leg.

            "Jamie?" he extended his hand and pulled her to her feet.

            "No, Jack the Ripper. I time traveled 202 years from 19th century London specifically to chop you into little bits." Was his drippingly sarcastic reply.

            "You scared me, idiot! What, did you take a specific stalker course in school or something?"

            "Yes- because we all know that stalkers yell 'VAL!' as loudly as they possibly can while trailing their victim." Val rolled her eyes and proceeded to brush the dust off of her pants- which were thankfully un-torn from the ordeal.

            "What are you doing out here anyway?" she mumbled as she examined the large red mark that was forming on her forearm. "Shoot, this is soo going to turn black and blue!" she wailed.

            "Are you gonna be ok?" he asked, putting his arm around her shoulder and supporting her as they continued their stroll down the street. She nodded stiffly and relaxed, letting him lead her down the dark street. "Brooke sent me after you- said that you could use some help." He informed her.

            "That girl's up to something. Her and her friends spent the past half hour talking about how hot you are, and what a great couple we'd make, and all that nonsense." Jamie was in hysterics.

            "Really? They said THAT? Those words?" Val nodded, scowling.

            "I don't know what's so funny about it."

            "Tell me that this conversation occurred in front of Wonder Boy, please."

            "Well, um, he was in the other room." Jamie sighed in disappointment. "But I mean, they were yelling so loud that he probably did hear it!"

            "This is too great." He replied, suddenly happy that Brooke had invited him to join them. And the best part about it was…. Tyler had no idea that he was going to show up… with Val, no less!

            "Well, you weren't there, in the thick of it. With all the yelling and the makeovers and the comparisons to sappy Shakespearean characters." She grumbled. "And then…. Then, after all I had to do tonight, they send me out to get a pizza! I have to WALK to get a pizza! I don't know what they're trying to-" her eyes widened in realization, and she smacked her head angrily. "- Trying to set us up!" She cried. "That's what all this is about! Brooke and her little friends are trying to set you up with me!" Her revelation caused Jamie to jump away in shock, a move that sent Val's knees greeting sidewalk once again.

            "Jamie!" She whined, picking herself up from off of the ground. 

            "Huh? Wha? Oh, sorry." He said apologetically, offering her his arm again. "What did you say Brooke and her friends were trying to do?" Val shook her head.

            "They're trying to set us up- meddling kids." She said with a light laugh. "I mean, isn't their little scheme obvious? Dress me up as some floozy rebel chick-"

            "For the record… I think you look good." Jamie remarked.

            "Thank you… I've always liked these pants… anyway… and then have me go out to get them pizza, where I'll 'happen' to run into you! They're hoping for some, big dramatic thing to happen between us, and then have us come back to the house a brand new couple- singing love songs and strolling hand in hand. It all makes perfect sense now!" she announced with a hearty giggle.

            "Well it would make perfect sense, `cept for one tiny little insignificant detail… we don't like each other like that." Jamie commented sagely. Val shrugged.

            "Yeah, you try getting that through a rock-hard twelve year old mind. Apparently there's a new version of the English language, in which 'No' clearly means yes, and 'Yes' is obviously… um, well, 'yes' is still yes." A car zoomed past them on the street, sending a cool gust of air in their direction. Val shivered again. "C-can I have your coat?" She asked, running her hands over her exposed arm to generate body heat. Jamie sighed- making a gigantic show of the loss of his beloved jacket- but never the less shrugging it off and handing it to her. 

            "There's the rental place." Val commented. As they walked towards the well-lit store, she pulled the coat tightly around her figure, hoping to hide her outfit. Her hands trailed over the worn leather, and she noticed that it still held faint smell of guy's cologne. It was the kind of jacket that a guy wore his whole life, only to give it to his first girlfriend and never see it again. The best way to describe it would be to call it a boyfriend coat, and Val already envied the girl who would be it's owner one day.  "I'm keeping this." She resolved finally. Jamie stared at her, horrified at the implication that he lose possession of his prized jacket.

            "BUZZ. Wrong answer there honey. There's no way you're getting my coat." He answered firmly, fully restraining himself from grabbing the black leather jacket from off of her shoulders and tearing down Main Street like a mad man. Val pouted.

            "I bet Tyler would let me keep it if this was his jacket."

            "Yes, outfitting you in sentimental men's attire does seem to be something that Connell would do, the schmuck." Jamie snickered. Val rolled her eyes and tried a different approach.

            "Oh, but come on, don't you think I look good in it?" she spun around once, modeling the jacket to prove her point. Jamie sighed, and finally gave a disgruntled nod of agreement.

            "Yeah, looks good on you." he admitted gruffly. "But you're still not keeping it. You can wear it until the night is over- then it's mine." Val gave a triumphant cheer and hugged him around the neck in gratitude, and Jamie had seemingly no choice but to grin. 

"Swimsuit shopping with you, running errands, giving you my jacket… how is it that you have me whipped, and we're not even dating?" he muttered incredulously, still not able to let her win without at least one snarky comment. She threw him a sweet smile.

"Cause you think I'm gorgeous…" she teased quoting one of her favorite movies. 

"Yup, that's it." Jamie answered, rolling his eyes nearly to the back of his head. "You're so irresistible, that I've become your mindless slave. It's all for you, oh gorgeous leader." He said in an unenthused monotone. Val giggled as he offered her his arm, in a gentlemanly bow. "My lady, shall we enter?"

"Yup! Let's go!" she replied, taking his outstretched arm and pulling him into the store. 

"Hey Waite!" Jamie and Val spun around at the sound of his name and he groaned as he recognized a rather large group of his friends that had been hanging out in the video store, heading right their way. Jamie of course realized what was going to happen it him if he was caught hanging out with Val Lanier on a Friday night- this crowd wasn't as partial to the overachievers as he and Caitie were, and in this situation, things could only turn out bad. He closed is eyes and put his hand to his forehead muttering curses at his luck. 

"Well, well, lookie what we've got here. If it isn't Jamie the overachieving traitor and his best gal, the cheerleader." One boy said with a cold sneer. Val clung tightly to Jamie's arm, nearly cutting off the circulation.

"What's going on?" she hissed nervously in his ear. Jamie shook his head and sighed, not answering her.

"Hello Kenny."

*          *          *

A/N: Yeah, I'm ending this chapter right here- so, as you can see, this story isn't over yet. If you've learned one thing from my writings, it should be never to listen to any of the things that I say in my A/N's. They are little bits off optimism that I add on while the post-chapter high is wearing off, and more often then not… what I say in them is never gonna happen. Cause by the time I get to working on the next chapter, nothing I though of before would work anymore… y'all know how it goes. Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter, and I'm happy about the number of reviews I've gotten for it! Reviews help me write faster *HINT* so… let's try for 60! Can you do sixty? I think you can! Tune in next time for another exciting episode! LOL


	6. A Couple's Spat?

 Hey Guys! Sorry this took like 3 months to get out, but this summer was a busy one. I've just started writing again, and if this chapter seems a bit off… well, sorry. Anyway, read and review!

Chapter 6

**__**

**_A Couple's Spat?_**

"Jamie! Wow, never expected to see you around anymore!" Kenny greeted, a false smile plastered on his pale face. "What happened, finally came to your senses and dropped the girl scouts at EMS?"

            "No, it's my night off." Jamie replied. "Why? Feel like taking another nose dive off of the water tower?" He added, smirking as the barb hit home. Kenny's expression darkened, just as the four of his five socially challenged underlings snorted with laughter. 

            "What, so now you're mocking accident victims for people's amusement?" He shook his head in disapproval, and spoke directly to Val. "Cheerleader, your boyfriend's breaking EMT procedure."

            "Jamie, that was a little mean." She said softly, keeping her voice low so that her chiding wouldn't be overheard, thereby adding fuel to Kenny's motor mouth. Jamie stared at her incredulously.

            "Ok, he can insult you, me, not to mention anyone else working at EMS, without so much as a squeak of disapproval, but one crack about his inability to defy gravity, and I get the PC buzzer? Well, you know what, that's just wro-"

            "Jamie." She interrupted warningly. "This isn't the time for this."

            "Isn't the time for- it is the time for this! I mean, why would you waste your time defending a jerk like Kenny-"

            "Hey, still here!" Kenny blurted, but clearly too fascinated by the interaction going on between Val and his friend to interrupt any more.

            "- And all the while leaving him free to roast me?" Jamie finished angrily, moving on as if Kenny had never spoken.

            "Because it's the gentlemanly thing to do!" Val snapped back, clearly exasperated, her voice rising. "You're supposed to take insults like a man, not engage in a name calling contest like a 5 year old!" She saw Jamie's shoulders tense, and his jaw line hardened.

            "Oh, so I'm supposed to act like that pansy Tyler then?"

            "This isn't about Tyler!" she sputtered. 

            "Oh, of course it is! Every time you open your mouth you compare me to him!" Jamie exploded, a time bomb of faded denim and spiked black hair. "'Tyler would give me his jacket.' 'Tyler's so great at math!' 'Tyler wouldn't make me listen to punk music while on the way to the mall!'" He mimicked.

            "I do not sound like that!" Val raged.

            "Yes! Yes you do! Not a day goes by without some token mention of Boy Wonder! You don't even have to say it outright, but the implication that I'm not as good as him is hidden in everything you say! Like a verbal 'Where's Waldo' or a hidden Mickey or something! Everyday you tell me how I'll never be good enough for you, not unless, by some stroke of joyous luck, God will answer your prayers and I'm magically transformed into that overachieving rock head!" Jamie yelled back. Kenny and his friends remained silent, watching the fight like an episode of Springer. It was evident, though, that if the two kept it up much longer, they were all likely to be tossed out of the video store, so Kenny took the unprecedented move of mediating the fight.

            "All right, ok, hey now." He said, putting himself between the two halves of the feuding couple. "Come on, let's not be like that." Jamie and Val continued to stand nearly nose-to-nose, shooting hateful glares at each other.

            "I hate you." Val hissed, narrowing further her already narrowed eyes. She ripped his jacket off of her shoulders and threw it to the ground, grounding it into the floor with the toe of her sandal.  To an outsider, this move was rude, but it didn't really warrant the outright horror that greeted Val's latest act of defiance. Even Kenny was stunned at the profanation.

            "Shouldn't have done that." He mumbled, secretly admiring Val's ability to defile Jamie's precious jacket like he'd never been suicidal enough to do. 

"This folks, is the girl that I love. Sweetie," he cooed, "I love how you take care of the things I lend you."

            "Honey, I hate this ratty old coat." Val sang back, kicking the heap of leather off to the side to emphasize her point.

            "Baby," he said, spitting out the endearment like a mouthful of soot, "pick up my jacket."

            "Like Hell I will! If you love it so much, pick it up yourself!" Much to Val's annoyance, Jamie did just that, scooping up his precious jacket and gently examining it for lasting damage. "You're such an ass." She muttered, staring down at him with contempt.

            "Well maybe you should dump me then! Go on, leave!" Val's mouth dropped open as he continued. "Take a jockstrap boyfriend like all your other cheerleader friends- In fact, Tyler's probably free tonight, why dontcha give him a call eh?"

            "Maybe I will." She answered haughtily, whipping out her cell phone and punching in Tyler's number. "It's ringing." She mouthed.

            "Go for it." He challenged, turning his back on her to examine the selection of new releases. Val waited through the next 5 rings until his voicemail message come on.

"Hello Tyler? Yeah, this is Val. I was just calling to ask if you, you know, wanted to go out sometime. Just call me back when you get this message ok? Bye." She said rapidly at the tone. Jamie didn't even flinch, but Kenny finally detached himself enough to intervene once more between the angry duo. Ironic enough as it sounds, the rebel that started the conversation by criticizing the relationship of the couple in front of him now was using all his energy to patch it back together.

"Jamie! Val! Come on people, you don't want to do this!" Kenny pleaded. "You don't want to split up! You were so happy!" This time they both rounded on the blonde rebel.

"WILL YOU JUST BUTT OUT!?" They screamed at him in unison.

"If we want to argue-" Val began

"-we're going to sit here and argue!" Jamie finished for her, earning himself another annoyed glare from the blonde cheerleader.

"Will you stop doing that?!" She snapped, "I can finish my own sentences!"

"Oh, and I suppose Tyler would have never even thought of finishing a sentence for you. Because he's _sooo_ perfect." He shook his head. "I hope you two are very happy together." He said bitterly.

"Will you leave Tyler out of this!" she yelled back at him. Once again they had squared off like two kick boxers, but dancing and fighting with words and screams rather than fists and feet. The cashiers at the front of the store, as well as the other 3 customers were staring tensely at the couple, wondering if police intervention would at all be necessary. By then, Kenny had seen quite enough.

"Guys, let's went." He ordered, looking weary as he walked towards the rental store exit. "Man, I just came out here to have some fun, not witness a bad episode of 'Divorce court." He muttered, walking out the glass door with his friends, still grumbling similar sentiments.

*          *          *

            Jamie and Val stayed locked in each other's glares till they could no longer see the store lights reflecting off of Kenny's black leather jacket. Then they simultaneously let out a whoop of amused laughter, nearly falling into the Children's Rentals shelves in hysterics. The remaining customers and workers jumped at so unexpected a mood swing, and the manager finally took change and stormed up to them.

            "Excuse me, but I'd have to ask you to take yourselves and your dramatics out of my store." She ordered sternly. "You've disrupted my staff, and your fellow customers with you're inconsiderate outbursts, not to mention, embarrassed yourselves!" Chastened, but not humiliated, Jamie grabbed their rental videos and lead Val out of the store, falling into yet another fit of laughter as soon as the door slid shut behind them.

            "T-that was the greatest thing I've ever seen!" He hooted, doubling over and clutching his knees. "Did you see his face? 'You were so happy!' He looked ready to call a marriage counselor!" 

            "I can't believe I just did that." She said faintly, a little overwhelmed and out of it from the entire experience. "I-I was like…"

            "You were like the evil bee-yatch girlfriend from Hades?" Jamie supplied helpfully. He pulled his jacket back over his shoulders. "You were great, but did you really have to do that abusing the jacket bit though? Was that really necessary?" Val blushed.

            "Yeah, sorry, kinda got a little carried away there." She giggled. "But it worked though-your friend looked at me like I'd burned down a church or something, and you! You looked ready to kill!" She checked her watch and gasped.

            "Oh God! We've been gone for an hour and a half! We've got to get home! Do you have the pizzas?"

            "I'll pick them up- and, of course, we have the movies." He said with a smirk.

            "Right, let's make like Kenny and 'went'. Tyler's probably frantic by now!" She said hurriedly, striding over to the pizza parlor. Jamie lagged behind, staring at her thoughtfully. Then he ran forward and grabber her arm, pulling her to the opposite side of the street from the pizza parlor to a little sidewalk café. "Jamie! What are you doing! We're late!" she said, a little panicked.

            "Val sit down." He ordered, nearly pushing her into one of the chic metal tables that lined the sidewalks in his haste to get her settled.

            "Jamie wha-" 

            "You made a date with Tyler tonight. I'm helping you keep it." He said by way of explanation.

            "But what about my sister's party? The pizza? I have to baby sit!" she protested. "That message I left was a part of the act! I can't-"

            "You can, I'm helping. Just wait here." Jamie answered brusquely, already running across the street towards the pizza restaurant. "Sit! Stay! No moving!" He called back over his shoulder. "Don't worry! I'll take care of everything!" Val sighed.

            "Too late, witness the worry." 

*          *          *

AN: Yeah, short chapter. But fun as anything to write. Did you understand what was going on? I told you it'd be a little off, but I hope it wasn't completely confusing. Sorry again for taking so long, but people stopped nagging me to write, and I just kinda stopped writing. See my profile for more details on that. Was it worth the wait? Review and tell me what you think!

**Mabuhay,**

**Makatibird**


	7. Loser

_A/N: Thank you so much for all your enthusiastic reviews! I told you I had Chapter 7 done! So… Go me!_
    
    _Disclaimer: Don't own anything, but since they stopped showing IAHB on Disney, I might as well… *looks around to ensure scary Disney lawyers aren't watching* They're MINE! HAHAHAHA!  (Yeah right, come on people.)_
    
    **_Chapter 7_**
    
    ****
    
    **_Loser_**
    
    ****
    
    _In the time of chimpanzees I was a monkey_
    
    _Butane in my veins and I'm out to cut the junkie_
    
    _With the plastic eyeballs, spray-paint the vegetables_
    
    _Dog food stalls with the beefcake pantyhose_

Meanwhile, back at the ranch (which is to say, back at Val's house) Attention had shifted towards a heated videogame face off going on between Tyler and Nick. Now, given the fact that Tyler had defeated all of them one by one, and that he was their babysitter, a large majority of the cheering was for Nick; though in reality, the "cheering" simply consisted of criticism. Very loud, unconstructive criticism.

            "Nick! Roll out the red carpet for him why don't you! Straight to the endzone! I mean, come on, DEFENSE!" Mark cried despondently, covering his eyes with his hands to block out the image of Tyler's players plowing right through Nick's carefully constructed defense.

            "Will you stop yelling! It's messing up the positive forces set forth by the feng shui of the living room!" Brooke shouted angrily, as she and her friends (who'd gotten bored by the video games, and, as a result, set forth rearranging the furniture according to the recommendations given in Val's latest issue of Cosmo) inched a table out into the middle of the hallway. 

            "You know, Val's going to make you put everything back as soon as she walks through the front door and trips over that potted plant." Geoff commented sagely, through a mouthful of popcorn. "Oh, and Nick, he's going to run right through the center." He added, just as Tyler, true to form, did exactly that and got his team another 10 yards closer to the end zone. 
    
    _Kill the headlights and put it in neutral_
    
    _Stock car flamin' with a loser and the cruise control_
    
    _Baby's in __Reno__ with the vitamin D _
    
    _Got a couple of couches- sleep on the love-seat _

            "Nick!" Mark screamed. "Your defense has got more holes in it than your freakin' head!" Not knowing how else to demonstrate his displeasure, he tossed a handful of Skittles at his losing friend. The hard, multicolored candies rebounded off of the television screen (and Nick's head- which wasn't as hole-y as Mark made it out to be, considering a lot of them bounced off rather than going right through) and scattered all over.

            "Hey! You're going to have to clean those!" Tyler barked indignantly, only to be met with a host of wide, blank stares. "I said clean those! Now!" Geoff obligingly picked one or two off of the floor and popped them into his mouth, sending the others into a fit of snickers. "Oh, yeah, you think that's funny? Well, you know what? Ha, ha, HA!" and with the final "Ha" Tyler switched the Playstation, as well as the television, off, rousing loud cries of protest from both Mark and Nick. Mark and Nick were the only ones who did suffer from this though; Geoff- who was neither playing nor coaching- simply shrugged and continued to eat candy off the floor, while the girls were too busy trying to heave the couch about ten centimeters to the right so that it would face the northeastern corner rather than the counter-productive southwestern one. 

            "Right, so, just a little bit more, and then we can talk about lamp relocation." Brooke said, panting with the effort it took to shift the oversized sofa. Tyler sat himself stubbornly on the couch with the hope that the addition of his weight would discourage any further movement.
    
    _{Soy un perdedor_
    
    _I'm a loser baby, so why don't you kill me?}_

"Brooke, stop moving the furniture." 

            "Why? It's my house." She answered haugtily, throwing herself against the arm of the sofa in a futile attempt to move it the desired 2 centimeters.

            "Well, your sister wouldn't like it. And it's her house too." He countered, winning the argument, and, at the same time providing himself with a whole new subject of worry. Where was Val? "Where's Val?" he asked the now grumbling group of pre-teens.                   

            "Last I heard, she was out getting us food and entertainment, which pushes her about ten notches above you on my Christmas card priority list." Mark replied coldly, still disgruntled at the loss of his videogame. Tyler ignored his frosty commentary in lieu of his worry for Val. 

            "That was 45 minutes ago. She should have been back by now." He worried, more for his own sake than anyone else's. Voicing this information gave him an excuse to fret- and fret he would. In his mind he was already drawing up about a million different ways in which a girl like Val could wind up in trouble- up to, and including, abduction and subsequent brainwashing by fundamentalist cult… 

Uh-oh, he shouldn't have thought of that one, cause even though part of his mind knew the improbability of a cult even existing in the one-church town of Kingsport, and even then the further unlikelihood of said imaginary cult singling out the one girl he happened to have a crush on and making plans to kidnap her on the night of her sister's slumber party- another part of his mind could already envision her wandering around LA in a tunic, shaking a tambourine and selling flowers for donations- and that was the part of his brain that he was paying more attention to. "You guys sit tight while I find out where Val went." He said in that classic "I'm-going-to-save-the-day-whether-or-not-it-needs-saving" action hero style.

            "Check it out guys! The mayor must have flashed the bat signal or something, `cause away he goes! Babysitter AWAY!" Brooke cried, sending her friends into a fit of giggles.

            "I don't think Val needs any rescuing." Nicole added rationally. "What with Jamie accompanying her and all." Tyler froze mid-step down the front entrance hallway (literally froze- his foot actually stopped in midair) and did a complete 180.

            "J-Jamie's with her?" he choked out. "Jamie Waite? That Jamie?"

            "Yeah, you know, tall, dark, handsome… Works with you at EMS, but dresses sorta better?" Brooke teased, rousing a collective sigh of admiration to rise from her host of girl friends. Tyler scowled.

            "Now I know we're not talking about the same person." he began "Because the Jamie I know is neither tall, nor handsome, and has a head that resembles a cactus- with the IQ to match." The girls stared at him in open-mouthed anger, too shocked at his rudeness to squeal out a reply as he chuckled for a few minutes at his own joke. "Now, can you tell me what Rebel-Without-A-Clue is doing with your sister?" he asked again, a tad bit less frustrated.
    
    _Soy un perdedor_
    
    _I'm a loser baby, so why don't you kill me? _
    
    _(get crazy with the cheeze whiz) _
    
    _Soy un perdedor_
    
    _I'm a loser baby, so why don't you kill me? _
    
    _(drive-by body-pierce)_

"Well, let's see… we walked, we talked... we did all those crazy little things that lovers do…" Jamie announced, singing the last line and balancing 3 pizzas, 2 DVD's and, most importantly, the beaten looking jacket in stack as he walked down the front entrance hallway. Tyler let out an aggravated puff of air and rolled his eyes.

            "Who invited him?" he grumbled, "And what kind of ironic timing is it to have him come into the house at the exact same moment that I'm asking about his whereabouts- thus giving him yet another opportunity to be a smart ass, and leaving myself open for the inevitable roasting that's about to come?"

            "The fates declared that you were to be majorly worked tonight- can we help it if we've been selected as the tools with which you are to be karmic-ly smoked?" Geoff answered, showing what Jamie thought to be an astounding amount of wisdom for a 7th grader.

            "And smoke him we shall, By God!" the rebel said with grand resolution. "So, what's the news Mr. Mom?" he asked the irritated blonde cheerfully.

            "Where's Val?" Tyler growled in reply- the only one to notice that there was a distinct lack of blonde cheerleader in the room… unless you counted that time that he was forced to participate in last years powder puff football game, where he was forced to- all right… there was one blonde cheerleader in the room, but it sure wasn't Val, and that was what he was focusing on at the moment. 

            "Val who?" Jamie replied innocently, biding his time as he racked his brain for anything resembling a plan. Tyler let out what he thought to be another menacing growl, causing Jamie to smirk and Brooke to stifle a giggle before she and her friends retreated into the living room with their goodies.

            "Chill Wolf Boy, Val didn't come home with me."

            "Yes, I got that the moment you burst your irresponsible butt in here without her. Now for the one million dollar question- Where, may I ask, is she?"

            "She's at `Le Monde, sitting her pretty self at an outdoor table and waiting for her date." Was the careless response that caused the blood pressure in Tyler's brain to rise to near seizure levels.

            "Date?" He ground out. "Who's she going out with? How could you let this- I'll KILL YOU!" He cried, lunging at the dark-hair teen, who had to quickly bolt to the other side of the kitchen table for safety.

            "Yes, I left so that she could go out with a guy that she really liked- A jock strap by the name of Tyler Connell, heard of him?" Jamie yelled as Tyler sprinted around the table after him.

            "You let her go out with that jerk! How could you!" Tyler roared, still caught up in his anger. Jamie's statement hadn't completely registered until they'd done a full three laps around the kitchen, and he skidded to a halt. "Wait… what?" he asked, thoroughly bewildered. Jamie collapsed to the tiled floor, exhausted.

            "I-we-she… Val likes you. Came home to baby sit…you're an idiot…" he gasped out, still laying in a supine position on the floor. 

            "But… how? I though that she liked you! I mean… she likes me? What?" Tyler muttered, still puzzled.

            "Don't like Val- stupid joke… feeling woozy…" Jamie answered, closing his eyes and resting his head on the floor. Tyler stood over him, still not getting whatever Jamie was trying to say. The rebel cracked open one eye and groaned as his gaze was met my Tyler's confused blue one looming over him. "What, you're still here? She likes you- MOVE IT!" 

"Hold on! So… she likes me."

            "Yeeeeeeessssssss."

            "And… she doesn't like you?" Jamie groaned again- how this guy ever made it to honors calculus, he'd never know.

            "No… Nunca… Nien…No like-o el slacker-o."

            "Ok… now what?"

            "Now you meet her at that overpriced café and make with the sappy goodness- or you run away screaming like the moron you are- it's really your call." Tyler looked like he was going to open his mouth and say more, but Jamie was quick to cut it off. "We are one stupid question away from decorating the kitchen walls with Jamie's brain. Not pretty, quite painful- Just Leave." Silence in such a way, Tyler nodded mutely, grabbed his car keys from where he tossed them on the counter and ambled his way towards the back door- the shell shocked expression never leaving his face. "Oh, and Tyler?" Jamie called after the retreating jock. Tyler turned and faced him, already halfway out the door. Mr. Waite had finally rediscovered his strength and was propped up on his elbows, his severest glare on his face. "If you ever hurt her…" he began warningly. "If you ever hurt her I'll roll you in seaweed and feed you to your own linebacker. Big Steve likes sushi, doesn't he?" Tyler smirked 

            "I understand." He answered before turning around and jogging briskly into the night.

            "Yeah, you better." Jamie murmured, specifically to nobody. Then, raising his voice he cried out in the direction of Brooke and her friends in the living room- "Guys? Hello? Slacker in distress here!" There was no answer from the preteen crew in the living room, save for a few giggles, so he called out again, louder- "COME ON GUYS! SOME ONE GET UNCLE JAMIE OFF OF THE FLOOR!"
    
    _Soy un perdedor _
    
    _I'm a loser baby, so why don't you kill me? _
    
    **_*             *             *_**

**A/N: Well, this was a really shotgun chapter. I just wanted it done, so if it's sucky, well, oops. I want to thank everyone for their awesome reviews, we got to 75! YAY! Can we make it to 90? 100 if we're really awesome? Hmmm… I smell a project! Pweeease review, and tell me what you think. The song, by the way, Is "LOSER" by Beck… it cracks me up, so there.**

**Mabuhay****,**

**_Makatibird_****__**

****

**_P.S: BTW, I know that they've stopped showing IAHB, but I hope that doesn't mean that you people aren't going to write anymore! Keep it alive people! *Holds lighter in the air* Fight the Disney Power!_**


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